Blog

sunset photo: red at the base, a strip of yellow, blue at the top. the top and bottom are black. The horizon is stretched, and the image is blurred a bit, so it resembles an eye or an oval tunnel.

You’ve been trying. I see it.

What’s happening now isn’t because of who you are, dear readers. Let’s continue to try. So you consumed too much ice cream, got wicked creative, were fascinated by death, made decisions with your gut, wrote inappropriate film dialogue. And?

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Tucker Lieberman seated in a wine-colored armchair, wearing a similarly colored T-shirt. He's in his 40s, white, blue-eyed, balding and bearded. He has a quizzical expression.

Am I the right kind of gay and trans for you?

Why our identities matter so much to us, why we bring them up, and why we use our favorite labels. My identity isn’t a bargaining chip. It’s an intangible. Try to touch it. It’ll vanish. The label denotes the space through which breath and fire passes.

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Monarch caterpillar clings to a leaf

Do we choose to be who we are?

And what, by the way, is choice? If you can’t snap your fingers to change, how do you change? What do we ask people to do when we ask them to change? Why should anyone change?

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Two Asian green bee-eaters. The underside of the wing is rust orange. The breast is vibrant green.

Green birds are birds

I point this out because you asked. Look at these bird friends. Both are green. They’re both birds! Neither is confused. Neither is upset. And your mind will really be blown when you realize—

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purple cartoon worm with googly eyes sawing its way through a cartoon brain, one half of which is black and white, the other which in rainbow paint splatter

Yes, Virginia, there are brainworms

And some conspiracy theorists do have them. Yes, Virginia, there are brainworms. They exist as certainly as transphobia exists and abounds attempting to morally mandate trans people out of existence.

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A person wraps themself in a gray blanket. You can only see their hands.

Is your clothing the wrong gender?

A proposed Texas law would classify you as a drag performer. A proposed law in Texas says there’s a proper, legal way to wear clothing and makeup—and to have a body. You must look like your “gender assigned at birth”.

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two cartoon people, with short hair, grinning. one has their arm around the other.

It takes two people to go on a first date

You may want info before a first date, but that doesn’t mean you’re entitled to have it. If someone isn’t allowed to have their gender at a key moment, they aren’t really allowed to have it at all. Cis people don’t own trans people’s info.

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